Pessimistic Optimism

Life as I see it… sort of.

Would Anyone Like to Borrow Some Water Flutes?

Whew! I finally found the laptop. It was lost amongst the thousand or so gifts my children received this year.  I wish there was one or two people to blame for this gluttonous presentation of playthings but many people were involved including my wife and me.  The worst part is that my kids think whenever they see someone they’re going to receive more presents because every couple of days different friends and family give them gifts.

The necessary cycling in and out of toys has begun, again.  The old ones are in the basement waiting patiently to seem new again or to be given to a younger kid to drool all over them.  Last year’s gifts look brand new, mostly, but are passé to the kiddies compared to the dinosaurs and cars, cars, cars that showed up this year.

I’ll have to admit that the children do play with all their new toys just about everyday, but they couldn’t get to every one in a twenty-five hour day.  Unfortunately, they even play with their water flutes kindly given to my daughter by her Uncle Scientist.  Some of you are allotted a break to laugh out loud at me about this one.  If you’d like to know what water flutes being played by a three-year-old sound like just have someone blow a whistle, any whistle, in your ear continuously.  Don’t get me wrong, I want my kids to be happy so I let them play with the “toy”, but my ears are still ringing.  I want my children to fight through their paternally inherited tone deafness so I’ll let them “toot” their flutes as much as they want… to a point designated by me of course.

I mentioned that my son received some cars this year, only about one hundred and fifty or so.  Did you ever step on a matchbox car barefoot?  I have, many times since Christmas.  All our rooms downstairs have cars “hidden” in the middle of the floor.  The worst part is seeing it and shifting my weight to the other foot, which happens to step on a bigger or sharper one.  But, like I said, it’s for the good of the kids.  My son is happiest while holding a toy car, especially if it’s the one that his sister wants.

Don’t take this rant as a complaint about people’s generosity to my kids.  Consider this more of a cautionary tale to future parents to break all ties with friends and family around the holidays to avoid having your house taken over by Lightning McQueen, The King, Mater, Doc, Sally, a Radiator Springs tent, a Diego boardgame, various dinosaurs, a truck full of Matchbox cars, two View-Masters, a Little People circus, Little People race track, an easel, a strawberry doll, water flutes, monster trucks, a road rug, screaming Cookie Monster, a play tool set, puzzles, books, DVDs and a bunch more of their friends unless, of course, you need a baby-sitter. 


January 5, 2007 Posted by | Christmas, Humor, kids, parenthood, Ranting | Leave a comment