Pessimistic Optimism

Life as I see it… sort of.

Is the Boy Decaf?

I was nearly an unwilling accomplice to a barbaric incident involving my children.  The older one, you know, the wise-beyond-her-four-years girl, advised her little brother of her diabolical plan that involved a play household item and him being put inside it for, of all things, my consumption.  The exact words that I eavesdropped heard were, “I will put you in the coffee-maker and Daddy will drink you up.”

Her statement stunned me, but also made me partially proud because she knows that she’s not old enough to drink coffee yet, even if it’s made out of her nemesis.  The fact that she involved me in the disposal of the evidence did bother me a little bit.  I mean, she didn’t even ask if I wanted to take part in her scheme.  She probably knew my answer would have been no because I actually like the little guy a lot and besides it’s always easier to ask for forgiveness than permission.

The boy’s reaction to all this was something to admire; he just ignored her.  It feels good to know that when a high-pressure situation pops up he keeps his cool.  It’s good to see that not everything I do wears off on the kids.

Thankfully the plan did not come to fruition.  In fact, I think that my daughter might have been kidding, might’ve is the key word.  As a precautionary measure I better inspect any food or drink that my daughter gives me, pretend or not.

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July 21, 2007 - Posted by | family, Humor, kids, life, parenthood, parenting

8 Comments »

  1. Next……….the unearthing of the plot to take over the world!

    (probably via the coffee pot!) LOL

    How precious, that little one!

    Comment by mel | July 24, 2007 | Reply

  2. The way I hear he’s running around that place, I wouldn’t be so sure he’s not already drinking your hazelnut coffee. and he’s definitely not decaf.

    Comment by Aunt Weather | July 24, 2007 | Reply

  3. Mel,
    When you say precious, there is an undertone of sarcasm, I hope.

    A.W.,
    We do not give the children the hazelnut coffee. Is the reference to flavored coffee a knock at my manhood? I can drink it strong and black, too, if I want to. I just don’t choose to.

    Comment by linusmann | July 25, 2007 | Reply

  4. Mmmm… Nemesis coffee is the best kind.

    Comment by Diesel | July 25, 2007 | Reply

  5. I would get a little worried if she starts poking around appliances like the Cuisinart, Crock’pot, or the George Foreman Grill. Yip, keep an eye on that little cutie!

    Comment by ZOA | July 26, 2007 | Reply

  6. Diesel,
    Some nemesis coffee can be a little too nutty.

    ZOA,
    Luckily, she doesn’t have a toy cuisinart, crock’pot, or G. Foreman, but she does have a microwave and blender, so I guess I should pay some attention to what she’s doing.

    Comment by linusmann | July 26, 2007 | Reply

  7. A good cup of kid-flavored coffee can be good in the morning. I mean I’ve heard that, I’ve only tried neighbor-flavored coffee.

    Comment by abarclay12 | July 31, 2007 | Reply

  8. Ab12,
    I think some neighbor coffee can be a little too rich, especially if they don’t bathe much or wear a lot of perfume, but that’s just my discriminating taste.

    Comment by linusmann | August 1, 2007 | Reply


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