A House Full of People
It’s ironic that I have the most time to myself right now while we have numerous house guests in our humble abode. There are literally hundreds of souls wandering around the kitchen as I type. Okay, there are really about four extra people here and most of them are in the living room. Because of this I don’t have to change all the diapers, prepare all the daytime meals and entertain all (both) of the kids like a typical weekday. Picture me in Mary Poppins mode dressed like a French maid running around the house. I’m sorry for that, forget the Mary Poppins mode, I’m not that good.
I should be relaxing, but I have a tendency to micromanage most of the mundane chores around the house. I find myself rearranging the dishwasher, insisting on cleaning up and supervising my kids’ meals. I just told Uncle NJ where to put a puzzle together with my daughter. What the *^%# is wrong with me?
No matter how crowded the house is you can shoot a cannon through it when the little guy’s wandering around with a foul odor eminating from his Pamper’s Cruiser. Too bad we can’t enforce the old adage whoever smelt it dealt it and just replace dealt it with changes it. It’s not as catchy, but could be effective.
I enjoy having people around so much that it makes me think we should have more than two children. I think my wife just fell out of her chair. Two will do is the motto that I’m going to stick to unless I slip one past the goalie, of course. That’s not too much of a worry because the goalie’s wearing very large pads and I’m a pretty bad shot.
Having my in-laws around 24/7 gives me a glimpse of what it must have been like growing up in my wife’s house. All the siblings regress back to their childhood personalities when some sort of adversity rears its ugly head. You know, if one of them moved the other’s glass of juice or tampon. Just kidding, they don’t drink juice. They don’t really argue much, it’s more like a drive-by put down; a couple of quick shots are fired and they let someone else deal with the carnage.
I kid them because I’m probably the hardest person to deal with during their stay. No matter how much I try to change, my inner anal-retentive personality pops out every once in a while or quite often depending on who you’re talking to.
All that said, I do enjoy having them around and my kids are ecstatic about it. I can’t wait until next weekend because we’ll all be staying at Uncle and Aunt NJ’s house where I can just fade into the background and laugh my ass off.